Dave Myers

Probably one of the most inspiring people I think a lot of right now is Dave Meyers (Joyce Meyer's husband). If you're familiar with their story and the early years of their life together you know that he basically married a complete B (Joyce at the time).

He admitted when he arrived home from work he would sometimes sit in his car and cry before going inside. Can you imagine a grown man crying because of the way a women treats him?

It's very sad to think.

But in the end, Dave Meyers basically changed the course of Joyce Meyer's life. To say she became a better person by his example is a BIG understatement if you know who Joyce Meyer is today.

So when I'm feeling really hurt I remind myself:
I'm just Dave Myers sitting in the car right now.. I'm just Dave Myers sitting in the car right now...

I know it's an unusual way to think and I'm not suggesting you stick it out with someone or you break it off. It's just a story I wanted to share and my personal thoughts.

Giving Thanks

It’s very crazy to look back on something we are so beyond scared to do at a certain point in our lives, and then in hindsight not even remember what the big deal was. You do it. It works out …and many times you forget to even thank God or the Universe for conspiring on your behalf.

A favorite belief of mine: “When you want something, all of the Universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”

When we are suffering, we are so in the moment. So in our misery. Our sad thoughts. And then really out of nowhere the problem ceases to exist, and we go on with our everyday living.

So quick we forget.

Forget to give thanks. Forget to appreciate that we have now was no small feat. We cried for it. We pleaded with the Universe for it. We lost sleep over it.

Just this year, it happened to me twice.

In the middle of this summer, I decided I wanted to take a web design class. I wanted to –but for many reasons I had such a strong fear about what seems like such an easy decision to make. I hadn’t been in a school environment in over 4 years so I had this strong lack of self-esteem. Maybe because I felt old. Or I was trying to relive something I’d already done.

I can’t explain it now but at the time this simple decision was causing such an overwhelming feeling of anxiety and fear in me. I prayed about it. I signed up for the class then dropped it. Signed up again and dropped it again. I signed up for the 3^rd time but on the first day, I sat in my car in the school garage for 15 minutes contemplating whether I should go down.

I can’t explain it –the feeling. But I did end up going down that day and eventually completed the course. In fact it was just like any other course I had taken before (surprise, surprise). Syllabus, assignments, final, grades, over.

OVER.

Fast forward a few months and passing thought came to me: “hey, you never even gave thanks for that.” I hadn’t. Few weeks into the class, my fear dissipated and it was all good from there.

How quickly I forgot to give thanks.

When Your Beliefs Fail You

Last week my friend sent me a text that said "my hopes and dreams are shattered." She had just found out her test score that, in one second, stumped her long held career goal in life. Living vicariously through my friend's successes in life, I was really devastated by this news as I rooting for her to do well. 

You see, about a month prior to taking this test I introduced my friend to The Secret and she absolutely loved it. The Secret is the documentary-turned-book by Rhonda Bryne that teaches on the law of attraction and the power of positive thinking. My friend was pumped! Yeah, she studied (it's debatable -- did she study enough? Did she not? How much is enough?) yet I would say most of her hope was riding on what the Secret taught -- that positive thoughts manifest positive outcomes. 

She took this in wholeheartedly. She kept the perfect score on her mind. She noticed coincidences that hinted she would do well. She confidently spoke about which schools she would apply to. Where she would live, etc. And then reality set in. Her test score came back and I got that heartbreaking text. Of course my first reaction was "Oh, shit! Did I do this? Maybe this whole positive thinking is bullshit! Why did I tell her to watch it? Why do I like reading about this stuff so much?!" 

A part of me felt guilty for the role I may have played. Did she study less because she felt that being positive was all she needed? Did she rush her exam date? Then back to thinking "God, why did I have to be the one to show her this stuff!"

I wanted to know where it went wrong and why her beliefs had failed her. Here is what I had come up with: 

a. The Law of Attraction is a lie. Maybe it just doesn't work. That being positive or negative doesn't affect any outcomes in our life. That what's gonna happen is going to happen regardless of what we think. 

b. That subconsciously she wasn't truly positive. Maybe at a subconscious level there was still doubt that she would not do well therefore overriding all her positivity. 

c. That the Law of Attraction works but great effort is still required. It's possible that the Law works but the bigger our desire, the greater real-life effort we have to put in to achieve it. 

d. There is a Law even greater than the Law of Attraction. Maybe there's an all knowing universe at play that has even bigger plans for us but our small minds can't fathom it so we view life events as merely "failure" or "success."

e. That if she was going to put hope in anything, it should be to God. My little sister said this. She explained that perhaps the flaw in the Law of Attraction is that it teaches you to put so much faith in yourself that you neglect the need for God.  

f. The Law of Attraction is real. Maybe the Law still works and this incident doesn't change anything. Every day people throughout every religion and culture hope for miracles and yet when another uneventful day passes, they continue to believe. 

I started thinking this does not have to change my belief in the Law of Attraction just as simply as having an unanswered prayer does not change my belief in God. Many things in life don't have clear cut answers and this may just be another example. 

The Productivity Blues

I haven't quit blogging yet, but at this point I'm moving slower than an injured snail. Usually I post something about once a week when I feel like it and that has to be the stupidest I could do. In case you don't know NEVER wait for your feelings to come around to do anything in Life. Do you think full length screenplays would ever be completed if the writer just wrote when he felt like it? Would songs be recorded? Books be published? 

I don't care how passionate you are about your Life no one is above feeling too tired, too brain-blocked, too weak etc to do what they know they should be doing. If anything, our feelings  are good for leading us to inspirational messages, thoughts, ideas, etc but beyond that they only serve our weaker self who is always too "something" to ever get shit done. 

Now I've known this for awhile and yet I'm still stuck in the same trap. Still only writing when I feel like. How much simpler would Life be if we lived up to the things we already know? 

Well that's what I'm going to try to do here. Ignore my feelings when they don't serve me. I've decided I better stop pretending I can write Monday through Thursday when I've spent all my energy at work and instead write several posts on the weekends that I can publish on my blog throughout the weekdays.   

Now you may think, I'm taking the inspiration out of the message. Not exactly. Like I mentioned I love the feeling when I think of a new topic to write about. I jot it down. And the feeling behind that idea/topic stays with me for weeks. It's just a matter of being honest with myself about when I'll actually get around to writing about it.

(insert real awesome quote about being productive here.)

The One... again

The other day I was out for a walk and decided on a fresh take on the concept of The One. For being a 26 year old girl, I honestly don't think about men as much as people think I should but for some reason this was on my mind. 

I've decided that I really like the idea that any man you love could be The One. And at the same time he's not The One. He is both. Why limit your entire love story to one person? Why feel you missed your opportunity because the One passed you by. Let's just say he wasn't the only One. hehe:)

Life is meant to be fun, joyous, pure, full of unconditional love, rainbows, and unicorns. That's what I believe and I want my beliefs to always work in my favor. So if I meet an amazing guy, I can definitely believe that he is the One that was divinely picked out for only me. And if I miss the opportunity with an amazing guy, I believe there are other Ones. 

(beautiful painting by Leonid Afremov)

Is that lying to myself? Maybe. But I don't think so. What I believe is what's true for me.

It happens in people's lives all the time. You know someone who you cannot imagine life without and you know what, it may never work with them. You guys met when neither of you was available. You don't live in the same area. He has demons to overcome while you're ready then he's ready and now you got to face your own demons etc. That doesn't mean you don't love each other. Or that they're not the One. But at the same time, I don't think you should become stagnant and think there aren't other people to meet out there.

Be faithful. Be true. And know that you are full of love -- to give out. There is an infinite amount so don't limit your love to only the Ones. 

Phillipians 4:8
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.

Make Me Rich, B.

If you know me, you may know that this is my 793rd attempt at blogging. According to Blogger.com, I've had my account open since 2007 with my first post written on February 4th, 2007. And outside of Blogger, I've written other pieces as well but I've hid most of my old material since I started to notice a common theme: sad depressing thoughts. And that's just not the way I like to think about Life anymore. Here was my first post on Blogger:

Feb 4th, 2007
"I was just thinking if anyone ever wonders about what their doing. I'm sitting here working on homework but i can't help but think if this what i was meant to be do at this time and day....my homework. Is it wrong to not feel motivated to do things because you know that we all have the same fate in the end? I'm not necessarily feeling this way but I know someone who is. I mean just imagine achieving everything you have ever dreamed of only to find out it was all for waste.

Tell me not, in mournful numbers, Life is but an empty dream! For the soul is dead that slumbers, and things are not what they seem. Life is real! Life is earnest! And the grave is not its goal; Dust thou art; to dust returnest, Was not spoken of the soul.--Henry Wadsworth Longfellow"

Besides my long history with blogging you may also know I have always talked about making a career out of it. Sometimes I say it jokingly, and sometimes I'm serious. I'm not even sure anymore. Most bloggers I admire have made a career out of it so it is possible, but like most people I have self-doubt. They say you need to find your niche to gain a loyal following and I haven't really discovered that yet although I think my blog would fall under: simple living, conscious living, forgiveness, love, etc basically all things nice :)

One thing I have noticed about bloggers who have made it and those those who haven't is consistency in writing. Simply put, bloggers are the biggest quitters I know. When I am roaming through random blogs, almost every single one I go through hasn't had an update in months which explains why it's hidden in the masses. On the other hand, some of the better known bloggers on the internet, James Altucher or Joshua Becker (who I just discovered is from Peoria, AZ and has over 100,000 monthly readers!) write new quality material almost every few days. 

So where do I fall? Well I'm definitely a quitter -- or at least that's what my track record shows. I'm not even going to pretend I can keep it up. Throughout my day I am constantly making goals for myself and quitting them all within the same minute. But sometimes, just sometimes  ...I set my mind to something and I actually make it happen.

Discouraging Danny

It's been the twice now that some good friends of mine admitted that I have discouraged them from trying something new or from being honest about something they wanted to share. ME? OF ALL PEOPLE? If you know me, I'm 24/7 on this "positivity" kick so to hear that sucks.
One friend told me she wanted to start taking guitar lessons and I responded: "You're just like me. You're always trying to find something to do to distract you from doing what you really want." In my defense, I compared her to myself so I didn't mean any disrespect but honestly when she told me, flat out, that she never signed up for guitar lessons simply because I discouraged her, I was so heartbroken. I apologized over and over and then I thought about it all night.

      
                                    

       (Okay, maybe it does. But you didn't hear it from me!)

Why would I say that? I mean at the time I did really believe that but why would I discourage someone from wanting to do something they were excited to learn.

I should know how horrible it feels when someone shits on your idea. Since I graduated from college in 2008 I've had people discourage me from trying different things (wanted to try the Peace Corp and my mom shot that idea down in .00025 seconds).

When you are discouraged from trying something, it can quickly kill the excitement you felt when you first started thinking about it. You almost become ashamed to even bring it up again.

Then the other day, another friend was telling me the latest news in her life and cut the story short. Her reasoning: "If I tell you any more you're just gonna tear down the idea." Then she went to say she liked what she was now believing to be true and didn't want me to "ruin it."

She didn't bluntly tell me I discouraged her but it played out in a similar scenario. So here I am talking "positivity this and positivity that" and my own friends think I am discouraging to talk to.

Now I don't say this to get sympathy or because I feel bad. I actually don't.  I just don't like being that person. Negative Nancy, Debby Downer, Discouraging Danny...

This is not some problem I need to fix. For me, it's as simple as consciously deciding I NEVER want to be that person who tells you not to try something again. So to all my friends, you wanna do what?! ...Tell me more!

The 10 Hardest Teachings of Jesus

Here is the list of what I think are the 10 hardest teachings of Jesus. The Bible is a wonderful guide on how to live. It is primarily a positive text on how to manifest the promises of God, yet alongside these great promises are some expectations on how we should deal with other people. When you go through the list, you will see why I think these are the "hardest" teachings to follow. Also keep in mind that as far as I know, none of these teachings include a "but" clause so as "Christians" we are expected to follow each teaching without an explanation or excuse to the contrary. 

1. Honor Your Father and Mother. Depending on how you were raised, this can either be a simple request or very hard to do. 

2. Accept That There Will Be More Rejoicing in Heaven Over One Sinner Who Repents Than Over 99 Righteous Persons Who Do Not Need To Repent. Sounds unfair but the Bible has more than one parable basically teaching this same message. That the prize goes to the reformed sinner versus the one who has been living right all along. The best example of this is showcased in the parable of the Prodigal Son. 


3. Accept That Everyone Who Exalts Himself Will Be Humbled And He Who Humbles Himself Will Be Exalted. The flesh and the spirit are at war with each other so you cannot exalt yourself in the flesh (hold high regard for yourself in worldly matters) and pretend to be humble at the same time. 

4. Accept That the Last Will Be First and The First Will Be Last. The best example of this is in the parable of the workers in the vineyard. Some workers arrived during the first hour to work and others arrived at the 11th hour and yet the landowner gave everyone equal pay --one denarius. Seems unfair but the bible reminds us that the last will be first and the first will be last. 

4. Love Your Neighbor as Yourself. Sounds feasible, right? If you surround yourself with good people who treat you well, you can learn to love them as much as you love yourself --because let's be honest. Most of our thoughts revolve around ourselves. We are a self-interested bunch. It's not wrong, it's just the way it is. 

5. Love Your Enemies. Now here comes the good hard stuff! Who as a Christian can honestly say they make an effort to "love" their enemy, whatever that means? Well in case you didn't know how to "love" your enemy, the Bible goes on to further explain. 

6. Do Not Judge. First things first, do not judge anyone. Once again, there is no "but" clause in this statement so no one is excluded. It doesn't matter what anybody does, it doesn't matter. Do not judge. 


7. Bless Those Who Curse You. As Christians, we are to bless, or want "happiness and prosperity with life-joy and satisfaction" to those who speak ill of us. Can you believe that!?

8. Forgive Those Who Hurt You. And not just once, but multiple times.  In fact, don't even keep count of offense because no number you reach can null and void this teaching.

9. Accept That When Someone Strikes You on the Right Cheek, Turn to Him The Other Also. Kudos to the person who has mastered this teaching. This is basically asking us to remove every little ounce of urge we have to show revenge to people who have hurt us. So much so that we are asked to "turn the other cheek." How profound!

10. Pray For Those Who Mistreat You. Hurting people hurt people. When we are hurt it is very easy to let our minds wonder aimlessly to the point of obsession. But really think about the other person for one second. Many times we know deep inside that this person is hurting themselves. Pray for your own healing but pray for their healing as well. 

Does this sound like a fair list of the "hardest" but probably the most rewarding teachings of Jesus? Can you think of any other "hard" teachings to follow when it comes to how we should treat other people? 

It Always Works Out

The other day I was checking in an older gentleman at the clinic. He spoke a broken English but just enough that you could still understand. Coming from two parents who speak broken English, I can say there is really something powerful when people try hard to find the right words in a language they barely know. It's almost endearing.

In any case, I let this gentleman know that he had a $10 dollar copay I would be collecting up front, so he gave a $20 dollar bill. Naturally, I printed him a receipt for the $10 I collected and gave him his remaining $10 change.

I'm not sure why he got confused by this since he felt compelled to mention that he gave me $20 dollars, not $10. Of course I agreed and explained that's why I was giving him a receipt for the $10 copay and then the $10 dollars back in change.

I don't think he really understood what I said, to be honest, but he just gave me this heartfelt chuckle and said in perfect English: "It always works out."

Now maybe I took this to mean so much more to him, but I swear the way he said it, so perfect, and so sincere just really made me believe this was his motto in life and that indeed it had always worked out for him.

I was just thinking, that's a beautiful affirmation to say to ourselves: IT ALWAYS WORKS OUT.
Thank you, random stranger.

There is healing power in my words

I am learning that there is power in our words. Here is some more insight into the power of our words.

"Out of the same mouth come forth blessing, and cursing. These things, my brethren, ought not to be so." James 3:10

Sometimes I think it is okay to curse as long as its not out of anger. But why curse in the first place? We are taught our statements are more bold if a curse word is thrown in there, but how talented is the person who can still make a bold statement with simple words.

I think one of the keys to maturing in life is self-control and discipline. And when it comes to our speech, although we may think to curse is no big deal, it is a step towards disciplining ourselves about the things we say (negatively) towards others.

"A gentle tongue is a tree of life, but perverseness in it breaks the spirit." Proverbs 15:4

When it comes to speaking ill of others, they say that when you know better you are held more accountable than the person who does not. All I can say is at my age, I should know better. One of the remedies to speaking ill of people is to learn to not say anything at all. Learn to just keep your mouth shut and don't give the urge in you an opportunity to speak.

Even during Jesus' trial, it states: "When he was oppressed, he opened not his mouth."

Even after we have this under control, we need to realize that taming the tongue also includes the confessions we say about ourselves: "I look ugly. I don't think I did a good job. We've always had trouble with money."

If you think like me then you may believe that by speaking these things, you continue to manifest these problems in your life. You must believe there is a treasure in your trial because honestly there is no reason why you would be created, via by definition of science or religion, as a human to just live a lowly existence. It just makes sense that you being here on Earth is purpose enough, and if anything, all that is happening around you is to further your benefit --either now or later down the road.



(sorry if my thoughts are scatterbrained. I will try to organize my topics a little better. Also, just to let everyone know, I am a big supporter of Joyce Meyer so it is very common if you spot her verbiage in my blogs. Thank you and good night.)

Forgiveness

WISH YOU’D GIVE ME A CHANCE

I’ve been trying to figure out when it was really over. Was it the last time we spoke? Or could I already tell, from the very beginning, when we started acting unlike ourselves. Depending on which answer seems right to me that day, I can either feel a little better or worse about it all.

I wish you’d give me a chance …..to forgive you. Because I already went through the phase of being hurt, being angry, and even thought I hated you for awhile.

But the more I read what the Bible teaches about those who hurt us, the more I realize I really want to forgive you. It’s okay if you hurt me. I know that it was never really about me anyway. You have your own demons to fight.

“If you only love those who love you, what credit is that to you? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good only to those who are good to you.....what credit is that to you?” Luke 6:32

The Master Key System CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER TWO:


1. Thought is energy. Active thought is active energy; concentrated thought is a concentrated energy. Thought concentrated on a definite purpose becomes power.


2. The outward and changeable has been termed the "conscious mind." or the "objective mind." Perceiving and operating through the five physical senses, the conscious mind deals with the impressions and objects of the outward life. It has the faculty of discrimination, carrying with it the responsibility of choice. It has the power of reasoning --whether inductive, deductive, analytical,  or syllogistic. Not only can it impress other minds, but it can direct the subconscious mind. In this way the conscious mind becomes the responsible ruler and guardian of the subconscious mind. It is this high function which can completely reverse conditions of your life.


3. The interior power is called the "subconscious mind" or the "objective mind." The value of the subconscious is enormous; it inspires us; it warns us; it furnishes us with names, facts and scenes from the storehouse of memory. It directs our thoughts, tastes, and accomplishes tasks so intricate that no conscious mind, even if it had the power, has the capacity for. We can walk at will; we can raise the arm whenever we choose to do so; we can give our attention through eye or ear to any subject at pleasure.  The subconscious mind perceives by intuition. Hence, its processes are rapid. It does not wait for the slow methods of conscious reasoning. In fact, it can not employ them. The subconscious mind never sleeps, never rests, any more than does your heart, or your blood. The subconscious mind is the seat of our principles and our aspirations. It is the fount of our artistic and altruistic ideals.


4. If we compare these two sets of action, the one decreed by the will of the moment, and the other proceeding in majestic, rhythmic course, subject to no vacillation, but constant at every moment, we stand in awe of the latter, and ask to have the mystery explained.


5. It is often true that conditions of fear, worry, poverty, disease, inharmony and evils of all kinds dominate us by reason of false suggestions accepted by the unguarded subconscious mind. All this the trained conscious mind can entirely prevent by its vigilant protective action. It may properly be called "watchman at the gate" of the great subconscious domain. The subconscious mind cannot argue controversially. Hence, if it has accepted wrong suggestions, the sure method of overcoming them is by the use of a strong counter suggestion, frequently repeated, which the mind must accept, thus eventually forming new and healthy habits of thought and life, for the subconscious is the seat of habit. That which we do over and over becomes mechanical; it is no longer an act of judgement, but has worn its deep grooves in the subconscious mind.


6. In conclusion, we find that there is a vast difference between simply thinking, and directing our thought consciously, systematically, and constructively; when we do this we place our mind in harmony with the Universal Mind, we come in tune with the Infinite, we set in operation the mightiest force in existence.


APPLICATION:


Take the same room, the same chair, and the same position, if possible. Be perfectly still as before, but inhibit all thought; this will give you control over all thoughts of care, worry and fear, and will enable you to entertain only the kind of thoughts you desire.

The Master Key System by Charles Haanel (summarized) CHAPTER ONE

INTRODUCTION

Some men seem to attract success, power, wealth, attainment, with very little conscious effort; others conquer with great difficulty; still others fail altogether to reach their ambitions, desires and ideals. Why is this so? Why should some men realize their ambitions easily, others with difficulty, and still others not at all? The cause cannot be physical, else the most perfect men, physically, would be the most successful. The difference, therefore, must be mental - must be in the mind; hence mind must be the creative force, must constitute the sole difference between men. It is mind, therefore, which overcomes environment and every other obstacle in the path of men.


CHAPTER ONE:
1. There is a world within --a world of thought and feeling and power; of light and life and beauty and, although invisible, its forces are mighty. The world within is governed by mind. Harmony in the world within means the ability to control our thoughts, and to determine for ourselves how any experience is to affect us. The world within is the practical world in which men and women of power generate courage, hope, enthusiasm, confidence, trust and faith, by which they are given the fine intelligence to see the vision and the practical skill to make the vision real. We are related to the world within by the subconscious mind. 


2. The world without is a reflection of the world within. We are related to the world without by the objective mind. It is therefore through the objective mind, by wrong thinking, that we are related to all destructive forces. 


3. Every thought therefore is a cause and every condition an effect; for this reason it is absolutely essential that you control your thoughts so as to bring forth only desirable conditions. Most men try to change effects by working with effects. They fail to see that this is simply changing one form of distress for another. To remove discord, we must remove the cause, and this cause can only be found in the world within. All growth is from within. This is evident in all nature. 


APPLICATION:   
Select a room where you can be alone and undisturbed; sit erect, comfortably, but do not lounge; let your thoughts roam where they will but be perfectly still from fifteen minutes to half an hour; continue this for three or four days or for one week until you secure full control of your physical being. 
    

I don't want a llama

Here is a short story from this little book I am reading called Notes from the Universe:

You wouldn't believe the stuff people think they want. Just the other day someone was asking for a llama. Nothing wrong with llamas, I have a few myself, but the llama he wants is supposed to help him with his business; schlepping stuff over mountains, they're good for that. 


Now, why do you suppose he didn't just ask for a pickup truck? Trust me, he could've asked for a pickup truck, and he'd have been a lot happier. 


So ....I'm off to the bazaar. In the meantime, should you need anything, please be sure to ask for what you really want. 




I was just thinking about my relationship with someone I used to be close with, and this story came to mind. This person has put very little effort to remain a part of my life and sometimes I think I STILL want them around. It is like God revealing himself to me and asking me to choose the one person I want in my life, and I am still ignorantly choosing the "llama."

But I'm starting to see the error in asking for something too small or even unworthy of myself because honestly that is the truth. You would think the person I would desperately want in my life would be just so incredibly  awesome, but no .....here I am asking the Universe to give me a llama.

It's funny just thinking about it, but it's a good lesson to know and keep in mind --think long and hard about the things you are wishing/hoping/praying for to make sure that you are asking for what you REALLY want.

Hello world :)

Hello world :)

Maybe I've decided to start writing again (we'll see) and since my way of thinking has changed this past year, I have hidden all my old posts mainly since some of the topics were just a bit nagging and depressing. I only kept my last blog just because it was the most recent thing I had written, but I do have to say --I honestly don't remember why I felt so strongly about my "soul dying" and I'm thankful for that :D


If I haven't already told you in real life, I will tell you here --I have been reading LOTS of information on positive thinking to the point of obsession. But a healthy obsession, I would say. I've just been getting it from everywhere --Joyce Meyer (I love you sooo much), books like the Secret, books on the topic written nearly 100+ years ago, the Bible, etc. It is amazing how these teachings are connected and all have the same message, simply put:

"THOUGHTS BECOME THINGS"




So be conscious of your thoughts for they are shaping your life every day! Anyway, hope to write again. Thank you so much for taking the time to read & comment. Muah!


--Georgina Shamon

The Death of Me

Why do we only care when the human body dies, but have no concern for the dying of one's soul?


I am dead right now, but you don't know because I'm physically alive. Is the death of my soul less valuable because you can't see it? Because I am still a breathing human after its loss. .. I can't handle it. God please take my life before you chip another piece of my soul.